I contemplated. I wondered, “how can I most effectively handle the situation?”
What does a child need who has said goodbye to his second daddy? Adoption, with the wonder of it all, brings its own dimensions, especially when the Godly man they have come to know and love as their very own daddy enters eternity unexpectantly. We all knew there were answers; didn’t God promise to be a father to the fatherless?
Yet as the rubber hits the roads, questions stack and we lose count of them. Despite all the answered prayers in the past, I found myself wondering what to do and then trying harder and just a bit harder.
As a young girl, I didn’t find life to be straightforward (more on that later); over the course of these years, I often clung to 2 Chronicles 20. With time my Bible flipped to that passage when I opened it. I was in awe of how Jehoshaphat gathered the people to fast, and when they praised God, the victory was won without them even fighting. The reality went deep.
Years later, I am a mom; I once more read the same passage and noticed how it says they gathered their children with them. Beautiful. What more could I ask for than to have the hearts of our little ones turned toward the Lord so he can comfort and lead them, no matter what?
As the rubber hits the road, it sometimes leaves black marks as we try to stay on the right path. At times it feels like more than I can do.
A few nights ago I was roused from my sleep to care for Joshua squirming in his crib. Then I realized I had just dreamed of someone handing me a tablet like the one I used to keep on my bedside to jot down thoughts and inspirations that would come during the night. It dawned on me that the evening before, I had told God that if he wanted to wake me up at night to give me the inspiration I needed, I was willing to get up and write it down. (If it’s not on paper, I can only remember it clearly the next morning.) Groggily I made my way to the kitchen and sat in the semi-darkness at the kitchen table. As sleepy as I was, it was special, just God and I.
Joshua had gone back to sleep when I was awake enough to realize I had dreamed about getting a tablet to write things down.
I wrote as it impressed my heart, how there are hard times ahead. Right next to that came the amazing verse from bygone years, “Ye shall not need to fight this battle… fear not, nor be dismayed… for the Lord God will be with you.” As my pen kept pushing across the page, it was really that in the heat of the darkest battles, many perish and will perish, but all who cry out to God are saved in the hour of temptation and adversity.
Soon I headed for bed with deep peace; I knew that no matter what, God is God. I thanked him and fell asleep.
A few days later, I called a sister in church and briefly shared things we had been facing with questions on how to handle some things regarding the children. She prayed for me and told me if I wanted, I could look up 2 Chronicles 20:17.
Not until I sat down with Bible to look it up did it dawn on me what this verse says. The promise was there, just like it was 15 or 20 years ago when I first read it. “Ye shall not need to fight this battle, set yourselves, stand ye still, and see the salvation of the Lord with you… fear not, nor be dismayed… for the Lord God will be with you.”
It went to the deeper part of my heart where words cannot touch. “Is God trying to show us that he can provide for me as his daughter and my children as his dear ones? Is his father heart of love sufficient?” I bowed my head and repented of desperation to do everything right in place of simple trust.
I knew there was never a way to accomplish what was ahead of me, but I do know one that can and will walk the course with me and do the work as I follow.
Join me as we read verse 30 in bringing everything together; it seems too good to be true! “So the realm of Jehoshaphat (put your name in) was quiet, for his God gave him rest.”
As you prep for your Thanksgiving feast, try our chocolate chip pecan pie, and if you happen to not be chocolate lovers like we are, just omit them and add some extra pecans.
CHOCOLATE CHIP PECAN PIE
1/4 cup butter, melted
2/3 cup white sugar
3 eggs, well beaten
3/4 cup Karo (I use natural sweeteners such as maple syrup)
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 cup chocolate chips
3/4 cup pecans* chopped or halved
Mix all together and pour into an unbaked pie shell. Bake at 375 degrees for 40-50 minutes or until set. Chill and enjoy!
* I like the look of pecan halves in the pie, though it makes it a bit harder to cut nice pieces, so use whichever you prefer!